Wish i could figure out what it is i need to talk about to create an audience, i mean do i have to follow others for the to follow me ... i would do that but on a few occasions i've checked out the other blogs and they are all family blogs or house wives with nothing better to do some hours during the day ... where are all the youths all the 20somethings ...why is it im on this site trying to spread some knowledge, trying to figure out life get different views and i cnt seem to find myself some responses ... this blogging this seems almost overrated.. in a sense...
Maybe im going about this all wrong ... someone help
Friday, September 24, 2010
Thursday, September 16, 2010
Just Curious
Does it make me a bad person that due to the long distance of my relationship, im tempted to seek affection elsewhere ?... Hear me out before you pass judgement.
I'm incredibly huge on affection, I love my girlfriend more than most think is possible to love another.
I'll never allow myself to Act upon the urges but i still get them, because i get them does that make me a bad person? .. Because i feel like one. I feel as though i should be able to block off those thoughts considering i made the commitment to stay faithful, but then the analytical me tries to rationalize or justify rather, my emotions, its like i go through this battle with myself day in and day out. I'm kind of afraid to be around certain females because i dont know what i'd allow to happen if things were to get "misty" for lack of a more suitable expression. Now see this is where it gets TECHNICAL!....
The Love of My Life .. has given me, so to speak, permission to be minusculely promiscuous... I haven't and I don't plan to, but she says she loves me enough to overlook it. She says she with me till the end, and it pains her when I complain about missing her so much, and being lonely.... yet she doesnt seem to be suffering from the same urges as I... Is there something in a woman's mind that channels their emotions toward their body or the other way around and keeps them faithful.
Don't get me wrong I do know there are women out there that cheat and are promiscuous as well as women who dont. I knw the reality of things and I know the possibilities and implications of such leniency on the part of my fiance. But I have developed trust with her,we worked hard on it as friends for seven years, became the best of friends before even implementing the very concept of a relationship...I TRUST SHE ISNT DOING ANYTHING BEHIND MY BACK IN SCHOOL... which makes it so hard for me to allow myself to dwindle in any other "cookie jars"... She doesn't deserve me, indulging in selfish pleasures, even if i never intend to let them go past simple cuddling..
Which brings about my next question..... Is cuddling with a friend cheating? Or, well is it forbidden when in a relationship??
I Wonder........
I'm incredibly huge on affection, I love my girlfriend more than most think is possible to love another.
I'll never allow myself to Act upon the urges but i still get them, because i get them does that make me a bad person? .. Because i feel like one. I feel as though i should be able to block off those thoughts considering i made the commitment to stay faithful, but then the analytical me tries to rationalize or justify rather, my emotions, its like i go through this battle with myself day in and day out. I'm kind of afraid to be around certain females because i dont know what i'd allow to happen if things were to get "misty" for lack of a more suitable expression. Now see this is where it gets TECHNICAL!....
The Love of My Life .. has given me, so to speak, permission to be minusculely promiscuous... I haven't and I don't plan to, but she says she loves me enough to overlook it. She says she with me till the end, and it pains her when I complain about missing her so much, and being lonely.... yet she doesnt seem to be suffering from the same urges as I... Is there something in a woman's mind that channels their emotions toward their body or the other way around and keeps them faithful.
Don't get me wrong I do know there are women out there that cheat and are promiscuous as well as women who dont. I knw the reality of things and I know the possibilities and implications of such leniency on the part of my fiance. But I have developed trust with her,we worked hard on it as friends for seven years, became the best of friends before even implementing the very concept of a relationship...I TRUST SHE ISNT DOING ANYTHING BEHIND MY BACK IN SCHOOL... which makes it so hard for me to allow myself to dwindle in any other "cookie jars"... She doesn't deserve me, indulging in selfish pleasures, even if i never intend to let them go past simple cuddling..
Which brings about my next question..... Is cuddling with a friend cheating? Or, well is it forbidden when in a relationship??
Wednesday, September 15, 2010
The (.>.< ) Wonderful World We Live In....
Aight, so im sittin here thinkin about the things people do to prove they AREN'T insane. For instance. this is just hypothetical, but imagine you deciding that you want to impress this chick you've been dating. You rent a helicopter, and some bungee cords and u jump out with a megaphone hooked up to amps outside her house, screaming "I Love you Suzie Q" (again i say this is all hypothetical.) What the fuck could u possibly have been thinking??? BUYIN A CHICK THAT IS NOT YOUR WIFE AND PUTTING THE CAR IN HER NAME IS NOT SMART !!!... lol just thought i'd throw that out there .. Truth be told its just some random thoughts running through the over populated caverns of my mind... Like for instanse:
Whats the point of Twitter ( all u twitter buffs can explain this to me in detail if u wish ) its like people don't already have enough on their plate they gotta follow u around via cell phone ALL day now too?? .. Why the hel would i want to know that u put the pen next to the note book".. yes I've received notice that tweets of that nature DO exist...And you people want me to believe I'M INSANE and YOU guys are normal... rightttt....
This wonderful world we live in is so full of fun incredibly painful to digest facts and fictions ... that we dont even know whats FACT from whats FICTION any longer... For instance... IM bored... but does that make it RIGHT ... does that give me the unwritten right to have a blog?? or is it whichever amendment that demands freedom of speech... (lol dude I'm Bahamian US Constitution is not even in the top ten on my "must remember list")
soo yeah .. this is how its gonna be until somethin truthfully ghastly comes around and fucks up my usual brain blasts of randomness... unttil next time ...
journal adjourned
Whats the point of Twitter ( all u twitter buffs can explain this to me in detail if u wish ) its like people don't already have enough on their plate they gotta follow u around via cell phone ALL day now too?? .. Why the hel would i want to know that u put the pen next to the note book".. yes I've received notice that tweets of that nature DO exist...And you people want me to believe I'M INSANE and YOU guys are normal... rightttt....
This wonderful world we live in is so full of fun incredibly painful to digest facts and fictions ... that we dont even know whats FACT from whats FICTION any longer... For instance... IM bored... but does that make it RIGHT ... does that give me the unwritten right to have a blog?? or is it whichever amendment that demands freedom of speech... (lol dude I'm Bahamian US Constitution is not even in the top ten on my "must remember list")
soo yeah .. this is how its gonna be until somethin truthfully ghastly comes around and fucks up my usual brain blasts of randomness... unttil next time ...
journal adjourned
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